Love - Its a special day!

Valentine

Love - It a special day

We should celebrate and appreciate

That you and me found somthing pretty neat

And I know some say this day is arbitraty.

But its a good excuse, put our love to use

Baby, I know what to do

Baby, I will love you

I'll love you. I'll love you

Love- i dont need those things

I dont need no ring

I dont need anything

But you with me

'cause in your company

I feel happy, oh so happy and complete....

So wont you be my honey bee?

Gving me sweet kisses all the time

Be mine, be my Valentine

Ohhh, Oh woah. Be my Valentine

- Kina Grannis

February 13th, 2011: Happy National Mistress Day.

10:30 am: Me and my lovely guy headed toward San Diego for the day.

When we arrived we were starving and had a quick bite to eat at Subway (my favorite). Our first love day activity was giong out onto the harbor and ride around on a speed boat. It was adorable. It was a 2 person speedboat- very romantic. He loves to drive boats. He made me scream out a few times - he was going really fast and hitting huge waves - but i trusted him completely (the life vest also was nice). He had the biggest smile on his face the entire time - and that put a smile on mine. Towards the end - he asked me if i wanted to drive. I wasnt too sure about this idea. Im a bad driver on the roads - imagine on sea. Freaky! In the end i did drive a little (only while docking which means i could only go 5 miles an hr). He did a great job at teaching me.

3:00 pm: We had planned to go to the San Diego Safari Zoo. I was so excited. Unfortunately, we found out that they closed at 5 so it was too late to go. We ended up going to a Navy Museum. We walked around and looked at the aircrafts. He knew alot about the planes and was a great tour guide.

Dinner time came around and we headed to gas lamp district. Well, this is where he thought the restaurant was (it was actually in old town san diego). We (now in Old Town) walked around saw the little stores and had a very romantic dinner at this mexican restaurant - outdoors, fire pit, candlelight lighting - AMAZING!.

8:00 pm: We headed home. Exhausted. We walked into his apartment and his rommate had prepaired a little something for us. He had 2 bottles of wine, had the fire going, and the grammys on the tv. It was perfect. We had a few glasses, laughed, smiled, and watched the grammys.

Time for Vday presents came. He walked up behind me and gave me the biggest hug as he handed me a awkardly shaped present. I was so excited. Then when i actually looked at the present i noticed it was wrapped in red chirstmas paper with little green christmas trees all over it. I started laughing. "Christmas paper, babe. Really?" I said. "Hey, its red isnt it?" He replied. Wow, isnt he romantic ;) On my attempt to open it I noticed that he literally rolled my present in the paper. It had a minimum of 4-5 layers of paper. When i finally did get it open - it was chocolate. A huge bar of Toblerone candy & big box of Ferrero chocolate. And i mean they are cosco size. I didnt plan anything big to give him. I just got him cheezy red boxers with cheetah hearts on them as a silly gift. I knew he would never wear them but i thought they were cute.

The next morning I was woken up with a nice cup of coffee and him saying "good morning, valentine." Once i left his place I went out to my car just to find that he had placed a single pink and white rose in there. It meant alot because he said he doesnt believe in buying flowers because they just die and a waste of money.

Sweetest day ever!

post pictures later...

A "Dead End" sign on the road to happiness..

Boy, has this weekend been tough on Muz and I. He talked to his parents (who are in India) on friday night, as usual, and they informed him that they are tearing down the building that they live in a year from now. They are building a 30 story apartment complex, which will take 2-3 yrs to complete. This pretty much means "get out." I talked to Muz on Saturday morning and could sence something was bothering him. He finally told me his parents situation and that he was worried. His parents are elderly (dad- 72, mom- 68).

Sunday came around (our day together)
I was suppost to show up at his place around 4pm. He kept calling me and calling me to come as early as possible - that he wanted to spend the day with me. I unfortunatly didnt get there til around 6. When I got to his place, i turned on the tv, as usual (they have apple tv.. amazing!) He then asked me to join him in his bedroom ("Um, okay".. was my tought). His roomate wasnt home so i didnt understand why we couldnt chat in the living room. I immediately got a horrible gut feeling, that something was wrong. He then closed the door, behind him and just hugged me so hard and wouldnt let go. He then sat me down on the bed (he was kneeling by my feet) and just hugged me so tight... All i kept saying "Whats wrong" "honey your scaring me" "what is it". He just kept shaking his head, and wouldnt say anything. He finally asked "where do you see us going?" I didnt know how to answer this. I hadnt thought it threw.. i was just going with the flow and see where we end up. He then told me that he has decided that he is moving back to India in a year to help his parents during there last years. At that very second water works began.

"What now?" "What does this mean?" " What about us?" "When are you coming back?" So many question just kept popping up in my head. He told me that this is permanent, and if he does come back it wont be for another 10yrs or so. For us- it means we need to end our relationship. I was heart broken. I couldnt talk. This was extremely hard. It is different when you are breaking up with someone that doesnt have feelings for you, have problems in the relationship. For us, we have none of that. We love/care about eachother so much. We enjoy just talking and being with eachother. He is the 1st personal i call or txt when something happens. I keep absolutely nothing from him. We layed in bed, in eachothers arms, and talked for hours. Trying to make sence of it all. I suggested: Skype, email, weekly phone calls, facebook, something... anything. He told me "NO". That type of life is not what we are destined. He said a phrase that just stuck in my head "If we do this, it will be like you are with a dead husband. I want to see you happy." He will be on the other side of the world - where night is day and day is night. I even considered moving to India with him. But, we both know that this is unrealistic.

Our conclusion: We go back to casual dating eachother, we date other people if we choose (we just cant tell eachother - it will be too painful), we still talk on the phone as usual, we will always be eachothers main support group - in other works - i got myself a new best friend. Our goal is to be able to say goodbye at the airport with good spirits, a smile, and wish eachother well.

So far... we are eachothers biggest support group. We call/txt eachother for a little picker upper when we feel down. Its working so far :) i kmow for a fact we will be ok. as long as we have eachother.